


The Dance

by clumsyghost



Category: Night at the Museum (Movies)
Genre: Enemies to Lovers, Jed is not a romantic, M/M, Octavius makes moves like a boss, Pre-friendship / truce, making out against a coffee cup
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-22
Updated: 2020-02-22
Packaged: 2021-02-28 12:22:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,750
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22850095
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clumsyghost/pseuds/clumsyghost
Summary: In the heat of battle, words are often said that aren't meant. And sometimes truths emerge. Larry intervenes after yet another argument between Jed and Oct.
Relationships: Jedediah & Octavius (Night at the Museum), Jedediah/Octavius (Night at the Museum)
Comments: 14
Kudos: 287





	The Dance

Fighting was a dance. You had your initial proposal - an insult or two. Next came hand placements, which set the tone for all the moves that followed. Once initial contact was made, the couple grew closer and closer, finding their rhythm in each well-rehearsed step. Round and round, back and forth, each blow counteracted, dos-i-do.

Jed was currently leading, having pinned the Roman general to the ground. He whipped out one pistol and leveled it onto Octavius’ face. The darn Roman should have looked fearful, not just madder than an old wet hen. Jed gritted his teeth.

“I’m gonna kill you and we’re gonna build tracks straight through Rome.” 

At this point, the usual routine involved a lot of oaths sworn in Latin, a struggle, a getaway, then a re-clash. What did **_not_** happen was Octavius rising up, bypassing the gun in order to plant his lips against the cowboy’s.

Jed had been kicked by a horse before. The shock was similar, except this felt way, way better. Like the first shot of whisky, spicy and heady, making his thoughts scatter in every direction. Warm and confusing. Just like Toga Boy. But what did he really know about Octavius other than the fact that he was a fiendishly clever fighter and had a massive army at his disposal? 

Octavius reversed their position in two quick movements. Jed felt the breath knocked out of him, partly due to the man’s mouth and partly due to his back hitting the ground. His hat abandoned his head, freeing golden locks. Jed’s right hand found its way to fist as much tunic as he could above Octavius’ armor plating. Suddenly the warm sensation left him and the Roman withdrew.

Octavius raised his sword, pupils blown wide as he stared down at his captive. “Your beauty will not save you.”

Wide blue eyes stared up at him in shock. Octavius braced himself for a verbal onslaught but Jed remained mute. Silence enveloped the museum as sunlight streamed through the windows.

\------

Pitch darkness greeted them as they came to. Jedediah must have awakened first because he was no longer under the Roman’s sword. Octavius could hear the cowboy pacing to and fro, muttering to himself. Octavius quietly followed. He could easily take the distracted man unawares in the dark. Such tactics were a bit on the sneaky side; the western ideas of fighting must be rubbing off on him…. Alas.

Octavius was almost within striking range when the world rolled under his feet. He lurched sideways into a wall; a yelp and a thump was heard as Jed met the ground. Brightness flooded their vision.

“Sorry guys. I tried my best to get here as soon as I could.” The night guard peered down at the open drawer. Jed was already back on his feet, brushing invisible lint off his vest. Larry privately wondered how the miniatures would measure up against dust bunnies.

“Why in the blazes did you put us in here for?” Jed hollered.

“I second the question, my liege,” Octavius chimed in with a frown.

“I couldn’t separate you two this morning, so I had to hide you. Do you know how fast I had to think to explain Octavius’ disappearance to McPhee?”

“What about me, Gigantor?” Jed asked.

“Umm, well…” Larry hedged a second too long.

“No one missed an undistinguished cowboy,” Octavius replied smugly.

“You would!” Jed glared down at his boots, folding his arms across his chest. “I ain’t forgotten what you did.”

Octavius reddened. Luckily Larry had no interest in discovering exactly what Jed meant by his words. Instead, the man held out his hands for the two miniatures to climb aboard. He gently deposited the pair on the desk then closed the drawer. Apparently he had brought them too close together, for both men shuffled away to widen the distance between them.

“Guys. This fighting stuff is getting old.” Larry took a seat in the computer chair with a sigh. Most of his difficulties in the museum had been ironed out over the first few weeks of his job, but the feud between the miniature dioramas still raged on. Perhaps a little more mediation was required. “Octavius, name three things about Jed.”

“He is reckless, brash, and ill-mannered,” Octavius answered promptly.

“And yer bold as all get-out!”

“Guys! I meant positive aspects,” Larry cut in. “C’mon. Octavius, please?”

“Nah, he’s said enough! I don’t need to know anything else ‘bout what Toga Boy thinks of me!” Jed stomped off.

Larry looked at Octavius. The Roman miniature’s expression was sad as he watched the cowboy’s retreating back.

“Perhaps you should go after him,” Larry suggested. “Sounds like you guys have something to discuss.”

“I am not sure he would welcome my company,” Octavius replied. Larry wasn’t sure either, but left to give them privacy. He figured there was an equal chance of a reconciliation as another argument.

Octavius followed Jed to the far end of the desk near the stapler. The cowboy wore a sulky expression as he stared out across the museum lobby. Other exhibits strolled here and there, but no one paid any attention to the two miniatures. Overlooked, underestimated. Their small world could feel so lonely at times.

“Jedediah….” Octavius hesitated for only a moment before approaching the other miniature. He maintained a respectable distance away from the edge of the desk. 

“I weren’t going to kill you. Yesterday, I mean. I know you know it’s just a game we play, really.” Jed didn’t turn around. He adjusted his hat then leaned against a coffee mug full of pens. One leg crossed the other, foot propping up at the toe. The picture of aloofness. How strange; Jedediah was the definition of a whirlwind of excitability.

“Indeed. You are a worthy opponent,” Octavius replied. His statement was in earnest. Jedediah may not be the official leader of the western diorama, but he was a true individual. The Roman’s earlier words came back to him and he felt a pang of remorse. What lies were uttered when tempers flared…

“Oh, so it’s my fighin’ skills that you like, not my _beauty_ , huh?” Jed snorted and drummed his fingers along his side. He turned his head, but Octavius could see faint traces of redness blooming on his cheeks.

“One is not mutually exclusive of the other.” Four decisive steps brought Octavius closer. Jed didn’t move away, which was heartening.

“Stop saying stuff like that!” Jed finally met Octavius’ gaze, startled at the intensity of the other miniature’s expression. Somehow the Roman managed to look both stern and vulnerable at the same time. Now was the perfect opportunity to get a dig in, to rattle off an insult and wipe that sappy look off his smug handsome face. The words didn’t come. His mouth felt dry.

“Why? Are expressions of attraction not acceptable in your culture?” Octavius questioned. He dared to take another step further into the cowboy's personal space. He studied Jed’s blue eyes, traveled down the crooked nose and lingered on the curve of downturned lips. The memory of their kiss was bringing all sorts of tempting thoughts to the Roman’s mind. How nice it would be to feel Jed’s lips against his own once more.

“N-not….not that kind of expression,” Jed sputtered. Why were his gloves feelin’ all scratchy and hot all of a sudden? And darn if his collar wasn’t feeling tight. Why did Octopus hafta stand so close? “I mean… it’s fine that you feel that way. I just don’t see how you can say stuff like that to me. We don’t even like each other, you know?”

Octavius closed the distance between them, pushing Jed against the mug as he claimed the cowboy’s mouth. Jed gasped into the kiss as the Roman’s knee pushed between his thighs. Octavius took the opportunity to deepen their kiss. A soft moan left Jed as Octavius’ tongue stirred the heat in his belly further. 

They didn’t like each other. Surely they didn’t like each other. He may have observed Toga Boy watching him at times, expression not entirely disdainful. And sure, he may have noticed the muscular curve of Octavius’ calves but they were Right There for everyone to see. That didn't mean he wanted to exchange slobber or stare deeply into those warm brown eyes as they broke for air. Why his knees felt so weak was a mystery. Jed turned his head as Octavius leaned back in.

“You would deny this?” Octavius’ voice had no business being that whispery-smooth. He adjusted his target, pressing kisses along the stubbly jawline then nuzzled his way down Jed’s throat into the redundant layers of fabric. Jed’s scent was decidedly less equine than expected.

“N-no… I just. Dagnabbit! Back up for a second” Jed yelped. He ignored a pang of disappointment as Octavius actually acquiesced. At least his bony knee was gone from his crotch; that had been on the verge of becoming an issue. “You like me?”

Octavius responded in latin, but his smile was smug enough to alert Jed that he had been insulted in some manner. “Yes. I look at you and I see my heart’s most private wish.”

“A ‘yeah’ would’ve been just fine.”

“How do you feel?”

“Sore! That armor of yours is heavy! And prickly!“ Jed rubbed his chest for emphasis. He _could_ have mentioned how nice Octavius’ kisses had felt, but he didn’t want the Roman’s ego inflating any further.

Octavius reached out to touch the cowboy’s chest, lightly caressing the supposedly affected area. “I shall remember that for next time and dress accordingly, mea lux.”

“Yer something else!” Jed reddened. He tried to step away, only to be reminded of his position. He could push Octavius away and make for the open, but somehow that seemed cowardly. “Look, Oct. Can we try to be friends first? ‘Fore all this courtin’ stuff gets in the way?”

“Ego expectare. I will be as patient as you wish.” Octavius extended his hand. Jed regarded him skeptically before slowly accepting the handshake. One firm movement later, Octavius did not release Jed’s hand, bringing up the captured knuckles to his lips instead.

“Boy!! I think I liked it better when we were fightin’!” Jed huffed and squirmed his way past the general. He was halfway across the desk when he turned back to stare at Octavius. “Aren’t ya comin’?”

If Octavius’ pleased look made his heart skip a beat, well, he didn’t have to admit it.

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt and the following lines were given to me by tumblr user mostly-natm:
> 
> “I’m gonna kill you and we’re gonna build tracks straight through Rome.” / “Your beauty will not save you.”
> 
> Thanks so much!

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [[podfic of] The Dance, by clumsyghost](https://archiveofourown.org/works/28563405) by [TheOneCalledEli](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheOneCalledEli/pseuds/TheOneCalledEli)




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